St. Marguerite Bourgeoys

I. The Sacrament of Matrimony

Some Theology. Saint Marguerite Church opens wide its arms to embrace in welcome those seeking to marry. The First Book of Sacred Scripture, Genesis, describes the creation and the beginning of humankind. The name itself, Genesis, is defined as “Coming into being’’, what better way to look at the reality of the Sacrament of Marriage, than as coming into being. Marriage itself comes into being when the spouses express their consent to one another. The Scriptural account states that the man and woman become one flesh. The “one flesh” union is a covenantal formula that refers not to the physical joining of the spouses but to the total human joining that comes about in marriage. This total relationship entails the giving of one spouse to the other for the purpose of aiding in the well being of each other. This highest form of gift requires that the spouses be totally faithful to each other, a fidelity that is grounded in a special kind of love, referred to by St. Augustan as conjugal charity.

Unlike other Sacraments, marriage itself was not instituted by Christ. Since it predated Christianity, the Church teaches that Christ raised or elevated marriage to the dignity of a Sacrament. This is so because He recognized something fundamentally good in the marital institution. The fundamental purpose of marriage is twofold: marriage by its nature is ordered to the good of the spouses and the procreation and education of children. The Sacrament of Marriage is also marked by certain unique attributes. There are total and perpetual fidelity and indissolubility. Once the marriage covenant is entered into, the spouses are obliged to remain faithful to each other for life. Furthermore, after the consent as been consummated by sexual intercourse, it cannot be dissolved by any power on earth.

The consent in marriage is no longer referred to exclusively as a contract but also as a Covenant. By “Covenant” is meant a relationship that recognizes the spiritual equality of the spouses and their capacity to enter into an agreement which demands the gift of the whole person, one to the other. Once this covenant begins, the spouses are joined by the unique bond of marriage.

The Sacrament of Holy Eucharist should accompany the Sacrament of Matrimony for all Catholics in good standing. The Eucharist is the heart and summit of the Church's life, for in it Christ associates His church and all members with His sacrifice of praise and thanksgiving offered once for all on the cross to His Father; by this sacrifice He pours out the graces of salvation on His Body which is the Church. Anyone who desires to receive Christ in Eucharistic communion must be in the state of grace. Anyone aware of having sinned mortally must not receive communion without having received absolution in the sacrament of penance. Communion at Mass is for Catholics in good standing only.

II. The Marital Preparation Program
Index of the following paragraphs:

1. Reserve the Church and Time FIRST.
2. Scheduling and Needed Certificates.
3. Marriage Preparation Workshops.
4. Pre-Cana as Soon as Possible.
5. Your Second Appointment.
6. Weekend Wedding Timing.
7. Confession and Receiving Communion.
8. Planning Your Wedding Liturgy.
9. Sacred Readings.
10. Music.
11. Flowers.
12. More on Flowers.
13. The Marriage License in BROOKFIELD ONLY.
14. The Rehearsal.
15. Wedding Arrival Time.
16. Photographers.
17. Wedding & Reception, All at St. Marguerite.
18. Fees.

1. Reserve the Church and Time FIRST. setting your date and reserving the Church. First, call either Father Audette or Father Gannon, or Deacon Howe or Deacon Detje to assist with the wedding and to schedule your first meeting - both partners - as soon as possible! Before making any arrangements, you must first set the wedding and rehearsal dates for the church. This is done at this initial meeting. Reserving the reception hall first can become a grave conflict with church availability. Frequently, the date chosen and reserved at the wedding hall is in conflict with the availability of date and time in the church. It is vital to first reserve the Church and then the reception hall.

2. Scheduling and Needed Certificates: During your initial meeting with the priest/deacon please make arrangements for a rehearsal date and time. At that appointment (or with the priest/deacon who will witness your marriage). Please have the following documents available:
a.)A certified copy of your baptismal certificate (within 6 months of your wedding date) whether you are a Catholic or a baptized Christian. Telephone or write the Church of your Baptism and request a ‘certified copy’ of your baptismal certificate be mailed to you.

b.) If you are a Catholic, certificates of First Communion and Confirmation. Catholics must have been Confirmed before marriage unless there are extenuating circumstances.

c.) If you are not a registered parishioner of St. Marquerite Bourgeoys Parish and do not live within the confines of the parish, a letter of permission and “freedom to marry” from your pastor.

3. Marriage Preparation Workshops. All engaged couples are required by the Diocese to attend a marriage preparation workshop - a Pre-Cana Conference. If possible, this should be done at least six (6) months before the wedding. Schedules are available from each priest. Also, Encounter Weekends are available sponsored by our Diocese and, under special circumstances, pre-marriage counseling is available on a parish basis. These programs are a great opportunity and better prepare you for the Sacrament of Matrimony.

4. Pre-Cana as Soon as Possible. You are responsible for making reservations with the ‘Marriage Preparation Program’, either the Pre-Cana or the Engagement Encounter Weekend immediately after your first meeting with your priest/deacon.

5. Your Second Appointment. Call and make a second appointment with your priest/deacon after you have been to the Marriage Preparation Workshop to further plan your wedding ceremony. Please bring to this meeting the certified copy of your Baptismal Record, and the dates/locations of your First Communion and Confirmation if these sacraments were not administered in this Church. For non-Catholics, only a Baptism certificate is necessary. Any Baptismal certificate should be a new one and dated w/I six(6) months of the wedding with a notation of freedom to marry.

6. Weekend Wedding Timing. Saturday morning weddings cannot be scheduled before 11a.m. since time must be set aside for other liturgies such as a funeral liturgy. Saturday afternoon weddings must be scheduled between noon and 3 p.m. so as not to conflict with Saturday evening Mass at 5p.m. Sunday weddings must be scheduled between 2:30 p.m and 4 p.m.

7. Confession and Receiving Communion. All Catholics in the wedding party are encouraged to receive Holy Communion at the Nuptial Mass. Although the Sacrament of Reconciliation will be available on the night of your rehearsal, we encourage all to receive the Sacrament before this time.

8. Planning Your Wedding Liturgy. The clergy and music ministers are willing to assist you in planning your wedding ceremony. Please remember that you are being married in a Catholic setting. Your vows, the prayers and the Sacred Scripture readings you choose, and your very presence, declares: “we believe in the Catholic understanding of marriage.” When you choose music, dress, and etc., please make sure that they also express the same understanding.

9. Sacred Readings. During your first meeting with your priest or deacon you will be given a copy of Together for Life to help you with planning the ceremony and to help you select your Readings for the Mass.

10. Music.Arrangements for the music, singers and instrumentalists are to be made through the Director of Music, Mr. Jack Basso, 775-4349. Please contact him for an appointment as soon as the church date for the wedding is set. Music selections can be made at this meeting. A fee of $125.00 is to be paid to Mr. Basso on or before the day of the wedding. Music should be played at the following times: 30 minutes or less before the ceremony - during seating; the processional; a brief piece during the offertory (unity candle/gifts presentation); a meditation piece during general communion through to the Closing Prayer; and the recessional. We have music from which you may select; your own appropriate music is welcome; check with your Celebrant.

11. FlowersYour wedding will take place within a certain season of the liturgical year wherein certain colors are appropriate. The Church may already be decorated for a major liturgy, e.g.: Christmas or Easter. Your flowers should blend with the décor, or may not be necessary. Furniture, decorations and linens are not to be moved or removed without permission of the pastor.

12. More on Flowers. Flowers, other than those already in the church, are your responsibility. Please let us know if you will remove them to the reception site. Should another couple be married on your date, it is suggested that you coordinate with them to share the cost of the flowers - no wire or sticky tape on the pews. Check with your florist if an isle-runner is wanted - the center isle is 38 feet long.

13. The Marriage License in BROOKFIELD, ONLY! You must obtain your Marriage License in the town of Brookfield - that is for all marriages taking place in Brookfield. The license must be presented to the priest/deacon on or before the rehearsal - A wedding cannot take place without the license. It is against both civil and church law. Check with Brookfield Town Hall at least two months before the wedding.

14. The Rehearsal. Please be prompt for the rehearsal! It will be interrupted or canceled should another rehearsal be scheduled on the following hour. ALL WHO ARE PARTICIPATING IN THE WEDDING PARTY ARE EXPECTED TO ATTEND. A well-planned and practiced rehearsal makes for a smooth and lovely wedding. Be on time. There are some known to be notoriously late for everything - a true friend would not embarrass the bride or groom. We ask that the photographer be present for the rehearsal

15. Wedding Arrival Time. For timeliness sake and the good comportment of the wedding, the bride and her family and bridal party should arrive at the church 10 minutes before the wedding time. The groom, best man, ushers and groomsmen are to arrive 30 minutes before wedding time - the ushers and groomsmen must seat the guests. If the wedding begins 15 minutes late, abbreviated ceremony must be used so that the following wedding or the next Mass may begin on time. Please, NO alcohol, rice, confetti, birdseed, or flower petals; please inform your guests.

16. Photographers. Photographers should remain inconspicuous, not shoot from the altar or interrupt the flow of the wedding, e.g.: backing down the isle in front of the bride while taking snaps. Video equipment should be stationary and not be in the sanctuary.

17. Wedding & Reception, All at St. Marguerite. Take advantage of the church’s park-like grounds for your photos. A large reception hall is available for wedding parties. The room can accommodate up to 200 guests and has an adjoining commercial style kitchen. For larger weddings, lovely tents seating more than 200 are available for catered receptions and can be erected in the area of the Gazebo/pond. Under the proper circumstances you may use our lovely outdoor gazebo for your wedding ceremony. Your entire wedding including the reception can happen here at a far less cost than most other places. Check us out and compare costs.

18. Fees. Congratulations! There is no wedding ceremony fee for parishioners in good standing; for non-parishioners, there is a ceremony fee.